Somewhere in Crete...
Dear mother of God! It's Tina!
Tina, baby! My sweet love!
Welcome, love!
Why didn't you call me to pick you up?
I didn't want to bother you.
How are you, dad? - Now, just delighted!
- Where are my sisters? - Vasso's inside...
And Marina?
On Mount Psiloritis...
I hope she'll be back before your aunt comes.
- How's the weather in London? - Rainy...
My point exactly... Come back where the sun shines...
BANG-BANG WEDDING! Directed by Christine Crokos
Marina!
Take you cell. It's ringing keeps scaring off the birds.
Sorry...
Eyes...
We're ok.
All right, guys, we've got it.
Ilias, you'll get this month's issue as well.
I have to learn Greek... Where have you been?
Signal dies in the gorge. We're guarding a lammergeyer's nest.
Weren't we supposed to marry in 7 hours?
I've been here all week! You were busy!
- Bet you I'll be there first. - You're on!
At 14:45! Not a second later!
It's my niece's wedding. Get it in your head!
I've got to go, someone's calling me.
Costas, is Marina back yet?
I just can't understand Ilias.
He should have come earlier, with us!
Mom, relax. Look at this place!
He acts like his father. I tried my best...
...so that you wouldn't be like him.
It's my entire fault. I shouldn't have let him study in New York.
I'm going inside.
- Don't sunbathe to death! - Yes, mom!
Myrto, you must be on your flight. Sadly, I'm still in Amsterdam.
I hope I'll be there on time.
- So, how are you? - Fine...
- Is it going to rain? - I guess...
I won!
Let me take a look at you!
I have to go get the bonbonnieres.
- What about mom? - Tell her I will pick her up.
She's cursing dad over the phone with aunt Voula.
- Dad called me 2 days ago, too. - What did he want?
- He found me a good job in NY. - Really?
- That's a big break. - It is...
- I can't breath! - We're not done yet...
- Do I look bloated? - Not even close!
Litsa is coming.
Marina, you're so beautiful!
- Not ready yet? - What now?
- Well... Where's your make up? - I took it off.
She took it off, she says... Dimitra got 450 euros for it.
How much?
200 euros, maybe... Come on, we'll be late.
My boy, lovely face...
Come on, open up.
Dear Mother of God!
- How do you do? - Chris! I thought the FBI...
...came to inform me that loser's plane crushed.
Ms Myrto, I got shacked again for asking 3 days off.
What lowlifes!
- Is Ilias home? - Yes. Right downstairs.
Don't be late! There you are. We're late!
Let's go!
How do I look?
Come on, come on...
No time to get emotional.
Arhontakis, it's 14:45! Can I get you something?
- I'll have some raki. - Put on your tie!
Tina, you're in charge of the gifts. Vasso, look at these shoes!
It nearly slipped my mind!
Ilias, rescue me...
Is someone trying to escape?
Nice maid of honor! Why were you late?
- I walked all the way from the port. - Why didn't you call?
You never pick up. Where's your make up?
Don't start on me, too...
Remember what we said?
- That we'll best friends? - Forget 2nd grade.
We said that on your wedding day you'd be like a true princess.
3rd grade. We were eating ice cream. Then, I grew up...
...I got eco-awareness, can free dive 23 meters deep...
...I'm nothing like a princess!
You are a princess.
Okay, I'm going to get ready.
Can there be a wedding without flowers? I'm coming over!
Everybody, to Halaris's Estate!
- Where should I put this? - Now?
Up your ass!
- Litsa! - Please! God, have mercy.
Served you right.
There comes your lady.
Can I ride with you?
Get in...
- Hi. - Hi...
Nice car! Do you use it as a hearse, too?
Strong wheels. Especially when the tank's full.
- This car has been to Monte Carlo. - 45 years ago, of course!
Litsa, come on!
- We forgot to pick up Tina! - We did what?
Call Nikos. I'll text you his number.
- How could we forget her? - How could we?
Turn on the a/c. It's hot in here.
You've a terrible sense of humor.
We're left behind. Will you speed up?
Look what I got!
- Are you crazy? - Now you noticed!
- I forgot to fire it at the church. - Thank God!
- Put it away. - It's just an air-gun.
- It's a pity your dad missed it. - Maybe it's for the best.
Mercy!
Go for a drive. Call me if anything comes up.
Okay, don't worry.
- A princess can't carry a mobile. - I forgot mine, too.
Really? How sweet!
I know where we should go.
- Why did you go that way? - I know the way! I was born here!
- Here says to turn left after Vamos. - Pass me the wedding card.
- Why? - Just give me the invitation.
Vasso!
Where are the directions?
Those fools! What fools! The directions were misprinted.
We're ruined!
- Didn't you tell them what to print? - Don't speak! Go back!
- We must call everybody. - Pardon?
- What if we skipped the reception? - And go where?
I don't know... wherever...
- Sahara desert, Nile fountain. - In this rented convertible?
- I wish you wished we could go. - Sorry?
- I wish you'd suggest it. - You think I'm crazy?
We'd be in Gaza Strip by now!
Have you lost your mind, lady?
You're talking to me?
Litsa, you're bleeding!
Who are you people?
Why am I in this car?
Out of my way!
- I couldn't run over the sheep! - There're goats!
- You murdering cavemen! - Sir, please behave!
Your heard can't cross the road just like that!
This passage exists 200 years. Who are you to tell?
Is this Highlander's wife, or what?
Manoussos, did you hear this young fool?
Say that again and you all die!
Step aside and nobody gets hurt!
Got it?
And don't you look at me like that. Costas Arhontakis is my name!
Take your goats and leave. Madam, we need your personal data.
There's a casualty... ... and a reception to catch!
Period!
- Dad, wow! - Quit mumbling.
Call the others and let them know, hurry!
Vasso, hi... What?
Marina's dad crashed the car.
No, everybody is all right.
Litsa's just a bit hurt.
She's got temporary amnesia.
Just our luck!
- So, what now? - We're off to the reception.
- Say, where do these go? - Here... Come dance with me.
I've got my monthlies and you want me to dance, too?
You fought for equal rights, didn't you? Now, serve.
Get out of my face!
Get this over with.
Fetch the glasses.
Stop it or I'll fire you both.
If Litsa finds any flaws, watch out for the worse!
It's not funny.
- A cigarette, please. - Didn't you quit in '72?
I just took it up again. Not even a word!
- Don't tell me what to do! - Hitler's famous last words...
- What? - Nothing. Do you smoke lights?
Damn it!
Dad! We have to take her to the hospital.
She's sleepy. It's a bad sign.
Dad, it's a car!
Stop, stop!
- Let's get going... - Let's get this over with.
Sometimes, I try to picture us in 5 or 10 years.
We'll live in a house with a garden, play with our kids...
- That wasn't part of the deal! - Meaning?
The planet is ruined, Antarctica melts!
So what?
Do you want a child in a planet with no future?
- Why did we marry? - They nagged me into it.
- Come again? - I didn't mean it like that.
I love you and I want to spend my life with you.
I have thought about a kid, too...
...but let's conclude about important things together.
I had a surprise in store but now you're scaring me.
Do I? It's the wedding dress.
Where are we heading to, exactly?
- I saw a doctor's sign earlier. - Keep your eyes on the road!
That's strange. I don't know any doctors around here.
- Yo Mani, do you read Koundreas? - Do you know him?
- No... - So, why are you pissing me off?
Kits, reading? That's a classic one!
No! I read sports press.
At work! That's why you can't keep a job.
Courier guys never go out of job.
We need a delivery boy at work, too.
Heard her?
In weddings, people get related and find jobs!
Guys, we're not lost, are we?
- Look at the map. - Men are so obsessed with maps!
Pull over, let's ask this shepherd.
Excuse me... Which way to Halaris estate?
Drive a bit further and turn left.
See? Piece of cake.
See? A gas station, too! Everything's going smooth.
My girl, things were different back then.
Everything was so simple and assured.
Except from Aristotelis, of course!
He run off with that slutty secretary of his.
They could talk, he said. As if I were mute...
When I caught them in his office, there wasn't much talking involved.
- Then you got back to Athens? - My chances were stacked.
At least, I had a flat there. Because moneywise...
I took him to court 3 times.
He tried to keep my boy, Ilias. He shouldn't switch school, he said.
He wanted my boy to be like him. But my boy came back to me.
- So you live in London, as well... - I do... Almost 20 years.
- I left when I was young. - How old are you, if I may ask?
- Nikos, where are your manners? - No worries. I'm thirty.
Come again?
Listen, I'll buy some chocolate. Can I get you anything?
- A bottle of water, I'm so thirsty. - Me too.
That's my boy!
Hello, these stuff, plus a bottle of water.
Don't you have smaller bills?
- I ain't got nothing! - I won't hurt you.
Stop it right there! Nobody moves!
Put your rifle down!
Don't you...
Nobody moves!
Let's go!
- Drive! - Ok, I'll pay you back on Monday...
Drive!
Guys, she's crazy! She's got a gun!
You're dead, you punk!
She's about to shoot again! I don't believe this!
What happened? You're such an embarrassment!
I came to Crete to be a maid of honor...
and I'll end up shot down, instead!
Are you nuts?
Be quiet! Do you hear something?
Yes, what is it?
- An helicopter! - Let me see...
No, it's a flat tire...
- Damn it! - That bitch got us!
- Why didn't you tell her? - Can you be any more stupid?
Yes, honey bunny... Yes, love...
Shut up, a cop!
I'll come over in a bit.
If he stops us, we'll get 10 years each.
- No, we'll be lifers. - You sure are going to be!
Shut up!
We must lose him.
Turn right on that slip!
Be quiet, shut up!
Get rid of that cigarette!
Will he be able to tell? He's a vet!
It's not like he'll perform extracorporeal fertilization.
- I got a headache. - Doctor will be here soon...
...with the diagnosis.
I hope we'll have time to go to the reception.
What reception?
The wedding reception.
Don't you remember how long we've been planning this?
Did we get married? I don't believe it!
No, it's not us. It's Marina.
Marina who?
The habitat's ruined!
- What should I do? - Stay in the car.
- Have you called for help? - They'll come as soon as they can.
Dear God, we'll burn alive!
Mother of God!
My girl! Your wedding dress's on fire!
Panorea, the bride's on fire!
- Are you okay? - Just great...
Is there something wrong?
Marina, stop now.
Stop it, I said! Look at you!
Don't bend over, the firemen were staring at you.
Since men think all about sex, should I stop bending over?
- You'll even say I did it on purpose. - What's got into you?
Do what you want, but I'm not getting back in that car.
- Me either. - Why?
Because the car's reported.
You think it's hard to locate a '63 Ford on Crete?
There must be hundreds of them here!
- What's up guys? - We're on the run because of you.
I never steal candy, you're to blame.
A plane, see? They're looking for you.
It's a water bomber, someone set a fire.
A retard like you, probably. "Kits" suits you perfect.
You know I changed my name because of you!
Guys, stop it!
And you, zip your pants!
- Let's call someone to pick us up. - Great idea!
Pick us up from where?
Kotsiphou gorge, since you're blind!
- There's no signal. - I'll walk.
- Let's talk this over. - Talk this over?
We're lost, no cell, police is after us, what more do we need?
I'm coming with you.
Let's leave. Someone might pick us up.
A police car, maybe...
What about my car?
Take it with you. We'll drop it off a cliff...
...and you'll see it speeding for a change.
Marina, hump in.
I'm sorry, the firemen's stare got into my nerves.
I don't want people staring at my wife like that.
Well... everything's okay.
Not a single fracture or a bruise.
You are very lucky.
Yes, I am...
There, see for yourself.
Is it that big?
No, not this.
Your head is that one.
- Congratulations, brilliant work. - You have a nice scull.
- I do... - Among other things...
Would you like to join us?
You should stay here for some observation.
I'll give you a shot for the pain.
Then, you might need to visit a hospital.
Visit a hospital? Who's sick?
Do you work?
- She's teaching French. - Was I talking to you?
No...
What is your name?
I don't remember...
What are you doing, mom?
Making up for the cigarettes I missed all these years.
This place doesn't look familiar at all.
Just great!
What's this?
That fool fell down.
Dad...
What is it, my girl?
- I want to tell you I'm sorry. - About what?
About mom.
Many times, I think she should have lived instead of me.
Dear God! What are you talking about?
It would be best if you both had survived.
But sadly, some things are not up to us.
Even though your mother has gone, she left you with me.
You were her last gift to me. My little girl.
And her death is not your fault.
Medical error, they said...
Hope we won't lose her, either.
Well, it be not that I be gutless, but I ain't blooming no more.
Back then, strong I be as a bear. This day, wobbly legs I be.
- What is he saying? - So, where to?
- At Halaris's Estate. - Losh! From that way?
- Bad ways you chose. - I knew it!
- Tell us, I didn't get a thing. - We took a wrong turn.
- God! Are we lost? - It's not my fault!
Worries not, friends. Left you turn, find the wund...
...then keep straight and you'll find your way.
Stop talking, I can't take it anymore!
Someone put me out my misery!
Hey, girl! All good.
Girl, you said? Go on, speak.
Marriage is a nice occasion. The bride be rich, even better.
- Have some. - What is this?
- Medicine. - For troubles.
Good stuff. Pour me some more.
- To good health. - Come on.
- Good health. - Good bye!
I'll spill it all over me!
More! This is good stuff!
Oh, all-might medicine...
- Are you ok? - Yes, you?
Dad?
Ilias!
My boy, you scared me to death. I'm getting old for this.
Let me look at you...
You look great!
You married the best of boys.
- I know it. - Did it go well?
Have you told her about the job in New York?
- What job? - You wanted to surprise her...
- Is that your surprise? - Don't! Let me have the honor.
I'm so proud!
I booked him a 2 year contract with a great magazine.
You're saved!
I'll give you the flat, too. We're moving to a larger one...
...since I'm thinking about becoming a father again.
What?
See how inevitable events sound like?
- How could you do this? - I did nothing!
You're planning without asking. Will I ever have a say on things?
It's you who proposed to work with me shooting photos of animals.
- Why didn't you tell me? - You were in the gorge!
- Can we talk calmly? - I don't care!
Marina, please!
Forget about me. We're splitting up.
Gladly, I kept my maiden name! Bye!
- Why did you do this? - What did I do?
- Tell her about the job. - Shouldn't she know?
- I didn't plan on getting it. - What? What about your career?
- I want a life, not a career! - I don't understand.
Bye-bye and take care!
- Are you ok? - I'm dying here.
- Why go high heels? - My boots didn't match the dress.
- What size are you? - Seven.
- Chistos's 7,5. Switch pairs. - Yeah, I missed wearing high heels.
- Did you hear this? - Yes, he was always a bit girly.
- I'm talking about the music! - Oh, yes...
- I like this song. - It's coming that way.
Wait, stop dragging me. You're a bit tipsy...
Steady now! Where's the medicine?
I'm useless without it.
That's it...
Now listen... We'll never make it to the wedding!
Easy now, guys.
Right leg goes first...
...and the left one follows.
- She got wasted in a flash. - Her spirit's down.
Her spirit's down for the past 25 years!
I had such a good time in Paris... I was young and beautiful.
I was dating a boy, Jean-Philip.
I'll ring the doorbell.
Don't!
- Why? - Just joking.
We died and went to heaven by mistake...
No, this is inferno!
Go call up the others. We'll stay here, covering your back.
- You go call them up. - Do you want take that risk?
Excuse me...
Where can we make a phone-call? Our cells are dead here.
Right inside.
- Thank you. - Cheers.
She sure is pretty.
Arturo...
Arturo?
Hello?
- Pardon? - Come to Arturo, baby...
Get lost, you pervert!
- Bare with my mom. - She's not driving, anyways...
So you live in London.
Yes, but I may relocate my business in Athens.
Would you like to go out to dinner with me?
You mean, just the two of us?
Hello. I have no money but I want to drink.
Please...
Cheers!
I know that look. Are you from around here?
I'm Costas Arhontakis's daughter.
Are you Costas and Anna's daughter?
You have your mother's look. Both fierce and sweet.
She was my best pupil. Never skipped studying.
Pity we lost her so soon. You sure must miss her.
- You're Tina, right? - No, I'm Marina.
I have small recollection of my mom. I was 7 when she died.
Our little Marina... The naughtiest of all kids.
You were always climbing on trees.
- I see you got married. - Yes, indeed.
- Why are you here all alone? - I fell out with the groom.
- All this is his fault? - No, he would never hurt me.
He loves you.
I think so...
And you love him, too.
He makes me laugh, most of the times...
- Where is he now? - With his family.
- You're his family now. - Life's not that simple.
Maybe it is.
- Can you give me an answer? - About what?
Why you turn down the job. It's a big break.
- I have other plans. - Plans can change.
That's why they're called plans.
First of all, I'm done with fashion photography.
Secondly, I want to stay in Greece.
And thirdly, if I wanted to leave, I would decide it with my wife.
You showed for 5 minutes and I split up on my wedding day!
It's just a lovers' quarrel. A touch of spice.
Why all the fuss about?
Did you ever care about me to know?
- Son, I want what's best for you. - Since when?
Ilias, you're my son. We may have fallen out...
...but I came all the way from NY to feel guilty?
- I'd better go then. - No need to, I'll leave.
You're leaving just like that?
- So, where will you go now? - To tell the guests we split up.
- Where are they? - At Halaris's Estate.
That must be Litsa's idea. That place has history.
She was supposed to marry there.
Litsa? When?
- I see she hasn't told you about it. - No, never.
Tragic story...
Two days before the wedding...
...the groom was stubbed by young Mouzourakis.
Poor Litsa... She was just 18 years old.
And Nikitas was such a nice boy... They were so much in love.
This party sucks. Everyone's wasted!
Where's Christos?
He went to make a phone-call.
- Have some cake. - Just what we needed...
- Do you know what my dream is? - I fear we're soon going to learn.
I would like to play for Greece vs Brazil for the World Cup...
...and score the game's unique goal on the last minute!
Picture the moment after the goal! I'd be a true god!
Crowd's ecstatic, and me, eyes closed and hands up in the air.
And somewhere on the seats, there's your beautiful wife...
...who happens to be a supermodel, too.
Right on! How did you know?
Imagine try scoring and falling on your ass instead!
The whole stadium would be cursing you!
Most Vulgar Player!
Kitsedin Kitsan!
I'm so thirsty. I go get some water and find Chistos, too.
We must leave sometime soon!
Well-well!
Hello. Did you call the others?
Did I? I tried, but something weird happened to me...
You're worthless! I'll go make that phone-call.
Excuse me, can I use your phone?
Thanks.
Do you know what Sandra told me? She saw Arturo by the pool.
- Really? I want to meet him! - Yeah, let's go.
- Hi. - Hello.
I haven't seen you before. Who did you come with?
- Arturo... - So you're a friend of Arturo...
- Do you want some? - Yeah, I'm so thirsty! Is that juice?
It's a Mai Tai.
Oops!
How long is the drive from Chania?
Could we have fallen in a time warp?
Have mercy!
They'll be here. Litsa is legit.
She hasn't let me down 20 years now.
- Why don't we call her up? - I did, but she didn't answer.
That's weird.
So why did they come all the way from Athens?
I don't know.
- You think it'll rain? - It never does around here.
- Where to? - To the hospital, pal.
- Why the hospital? - To take a look at you.
- What's wrong with me? - There we go again.
You hurt your head.
I don't believe this! Do me a favor!
Shame on you! Firstly, I don't know you people!
Mr Taxidriver, let's go to that graduation party.
- At the wedding reception! - Right...
- Where are you headed? - You pick.
- Halaris's Estate. - Ok, I'll give you a lift.
After I drop off Lina at a party...
- Hump in! - May I?
Who is this Litsa? It beats me...
Seals are opened! Repent!
I'm so sorry!
Why are you going to Halaris Estate?
For my wedding reception.
So why were you walking all alone?
We had a fight.
- Did you split up? - She dumped me after 3hs 45min.
- Where are you from, pal? - My parents are Greek...
...but I've been living here for the past 5 years.
How come?
I travelled a lot and then, I fell in love.
How sweet! See? Men fall in love, too.
You should go after her. Do what Arturo did.
Go on, tell her... What's her name?
Marina.
Marina, you're the love of my life.
I want you to be the mother of my child.
That one always works, it's guaranteed.
- I'm not so sure... - Good, cause Arturo didn't change.
He doesn't pay Stella's alimony.
Papers, please.
- And blow into this tube. - I have nothing, I just got married.
This is not an excuse. Blow, I said.
See, I'm in my wedding dress. I had to drive the car.
All this seems a bit strange.
There's a report on an armed robbery.
So what?
The culprits were well dressed, too.
A lot of questions rise... Could they be coming at your wedding?
Could you be the leader's daughter?
Are you serious? This is hilarious!
ID no: X 21-64-52.
- Is the car yours? - No...
No. Registration, please.
Station, do you read me? I need a car confirmation, over.
79, please repeat. We're not reading.
Calling station...
Good evening to all.
What has happened here?
- Isn't this our fuc... - Mom!
Myrto... You haven't changed one bit.
Nikos boy, let me give you a hug!
You've grown up! You're a man now!
Yes, in the process, you were concerned with other babies.
Has Ilias shown up? He left us a bit jumpy.
Jumpy? Why?
- What about Marina? - She left earlier.
- Wait a second, now! - What have you done to the kids?
- Who's this? - Nice to meet you.
I'm Aristotelis Georgantas.
Is this supposed to mean something?
He's father to me and Ilias.
- And this is... - My wife, Julia.
Where are the newlyweds? I want to dance!
It's my fault. I'll explain everything.
- Go ahead... - Marina got furious...
...when I mentioned Ilias's potential job in New York.
What?
Don't you dare, Aristotelis.
You won't take my son away again!
I'll kill you...
I'll kill you!
Right on!
Arturo, huh?
I feel a bit strange. Do you think it's because of the cake?
The police!
- What are we going to do? - Hide down there!
So you are Arturo's friend. Are so glad to see me?
No, there's a gun in his pocket!
What happened? What are you doing over me?
Why am I lying down?
- Are you okay? - She's alive!
Where is Marina?
The kids have disappeared!
How can it be? What do you mean? Let's call them up.
Call the police, the fire brigade, someone!
- Has anyone called the Estate? - Only some pervert!
What is she doing? Is she beating them?
So, it was the right party after all... Marina is here.
- What is this place? - It's a party!
- What has happened to you? - I got to go, police are after me.
They're after us, too!
- What have you done to her? - Nothing, honestly!
Marina, you're so tribal, whatever that means!
- What are you doing here? - Having sex.
And you?
Good question. I need to call Litsa.
- Litsa has amnesia. - What?
She got hurt in your dad's car-crash!
What? I must find them!
- It's a minor thing. Don't worry. - Excuse me... but where is Ilias?
There he is!
- It was a pleasure! - Drop by later...
Shame on you!
- Nandia, what are you doing here? - Who are those?
I hitch-hiked to get to Marina.
Our princess ran into the forest.
Will the knight find her or will their secrets fade?
- Is this an LSD party? - Marina just left.
- Where to? - That way.
We'll meet at the reception.
Hurry, she runs like the wind!
Call me sometime... To go out for a drink.
Of course, thanks for everything.
Get out of my face, I hit the wrong person!
- What's the body count here? - Get serious for once!
- Mrs Litsa, how are you? - Christos, is that you?
Marina and Ilias disappeared!
We saw them, they're on their way.
They're on their way!
Bring the champagne!
They're here!
My love, where have you been? Here, there's your dad.
Dad, I don't want to leave ever again.
Dear God!
Remember the surprise I told you about?
Will I stand the heat?
Nairobi!
Okay, okay! I'll make a toast.
I have been unfair and mean towards a lot of people.
I want to say I'm sorry.
I'm also sorry for Costakis Balafoutas...
...cause I pushed him off our roof in the summer of '81...
...and he broke his arm!
Everybody, let's sing a song for sadly wasted Kostakis.
He didn't die, you!
Congratulations!
Virgin Mary!
This is the end of the world!
Long live the newlyweds!
The end
Translation Maria Polychronopoulou
Subtitling process Audio Visual Enterprises
2007- ARGONAUTS S.A.